I had just recently moved back to LA to pursue a career in wardrobe styling. I was working part time in clothing retail, part time at a styling house and trying to grab freelance opportunities for styling gigs anywhere I could. In this world you don't meet very many straight men. While I wasn't actively searching for The One I knew I wanted to date and maybe, just maybe I would meet someone I actually connected with. I was building new friendships with coworkers and catching up with old friends in my free time. Going out to bars and events wasn't where I was looking to meet anyone. I had mixed experiences dating online back in Portland but decided to give it a whirl in Los Angeles.
I am genuinely first attracted to men by their face. It's just how I roll. I'm a visual person. I love squinty eyes and a little bit of a goofy smile. I also really like that white bread. While I was on the dating website I saw a face flash on my screen of this dark haired, blue green eyed guy. I checked our "match" rate and it was 80ish%. I'm not sure how they calculate that but I was going to put trust into the system. The rest of his profile photos were of him out with friends, a Halloween party, playing darts, at a birthday party and at a park. His info was pretty minimal but nothing sent me red flags. Then there was a question on the site that every profile has "What do you spend most of your time thinking about?" His answer: What I'm going to eat next. SOLD. However, I didn't message him. I think I was in this headspace where I was going to try and be more formal with my dating strategy and let the men pursue me. I've sort of always been the aggressor. So true to my nature I aggressively stalked his profile for the next week but I still didn't message him. All the while the website sent him a notification every time I viewed his profile. This was information I didn't know until he told me and I am still surprised he decided to message me after all those email notifications but he did! We made some light small talk online and he was quick to set up an in person date.
Our date was set for June 12th at Cat and the Fiddle in Hollywood. I don't remember if I was nervous other than the superficial fear that comes with online dating where the person looks nothing like their photos. When I walked in he was sitting at the bar watching the basketball game. I remember the exact shirt he was wearing ( I regularly slept in it at our sleepovers and then turned it into a handkerchief for our wedding day) He was tall and had the same beautiful eyes I first was captivated by online. We moved over to a booth and ordered drinks. His side of the story was he was intrigued when I ordered a Guinness. We had our small talk over careers, other dating horror stories and chatted a bit about my time in Portland. I found out his two friends (one of which married us) had actually set up his profile for him much against his will.
After a few drinks he suggested we play darts. Growing up in Las Vegas it's second nature for me to make any game a gamble. I asked him what the bet terms were and he replied, with a smirk, "Loser has to plan the second date." SNEAKY SNEAKY. I was already committing to a second date. Much to my competitive nature I did not give up easily, but I did lose by half a point. I was a woman of my word and I planned the second date......which turned into a third date and after that we were pretty much inseparable.
6 months later we moved in together. We got a dog together. We got engaged. We went on trips. We changed careers. We got married. We moved to Portland. We made a human (due in July).
All these things I would have never expected from online dating but I am so happy I didn't listen to the stigma of it. That I brushed off the creepers that messaged me. That I trusted the websites 80ish% compatibility match. I don't know any other way I would have met my amazing love. So thank you internet. You are filled with a lot of crap but you are also filled wonderful surprises. Some that lead to a winning game of darts.